Thursday, October 8, 2015

World Weary Woman : Her Wound and Transformation by Cara Barker



The title of this book immediately grabbed my attention, World Weary Woman, I did indeed feel weary, world weary!  Bone tired from the weight of the world’s demands, the judgements, the constant need for setting goals and achievement, the attending to my wounds, the relentless searching and searching and searching. Was I a world weary woman?

 “Barely breathing. They pause infrequently. Too busy trying hard to never miss a thing, leaving no stone unturned. Hyper vigilant in endless search – searching and searching and searching. When will it stop? All floodlights scanning for their fatal flaw. That one thing … that one perfect answer; that simple explanation which will, at last, redeem … let them rest. Take in, digest that promise of peace that eludes the clutch and grasp. Anything but casual, their quest has been relentless. Looking, ever looking, for the answer. So that then, finally weary of strong-arming themselves against the world, from a pain that comes from too deep and dark a well, they can at last, weary of the battle, sink into those Arms. Rest. Renewal. A place in which to contain what has been neglected for far too long…. They have made it a full-time job… to change, alter, cut away, suck-out, like liposuction, anything which seems imperfect, too human, too ordinary, too plain, too small.”

Barker’s description of World Weary Woman knocked the wind out of me, I felt as if she had gained access to my inner most, private sanctum and was baring my soul to the world. Yes, indeed I am a world weary woman!

Cara Barker spent ten years studying the wounds and journey of World Weary Woman. The book begins with an outline of the World Weary Woman study, and then begins the exploration of Who Is World Weary Woman? This chapter explores the source of the wounding, the strategies developed to cope with loss, the unifying thread in the lives of World Weary Woman, the fear of being unlovable, the fear of failure, the over identification with the masculine action as compensation,  the call to course correct ego one-sidedness and the search for alternative paths.  All of which sounds terribly depressing and gloomy but which somehow I found comforting. Suddenly I was not alone in my wounding or my journey:

“But we are not the first, and we are not alone. As we are reminded through the stories of other people, there are those who have gone before.”

I found myself laughing quietly to myself about my imperfections, free to acknowledge “Yes, I do that” and “Oh, so that’s where that comes from!” I discovered that “In the hole” that “suffering brings, an opening is made, not unlike a well. Such a place within World Weary Woman’s psyche is nothing less than a birthing passage way: through death comes life anew.” And yes indeed, I needed a new source of energy, a new way of doing things, a new lease on life.

The following chapters explore the journey and wounding of World Weary Woman, her struggle, the fall out of harmony with her centre, her soul, the drive to produce, the time frustrations, the secret sense of failure, what hinders finding the treasure, learning to stand up for herself and the importance of having the correct attitude that enables a connection with the Self.

Throughout these chapters, Barker explores the antidote for World Weary Woman:

 “From my first meetings with World Weary Woman, it was clear that she could work. She could analyze, psychologize. But she had not learned how to play… It is in pausing to connect with her own inner wisdom that World Weary Woman learns to create…to cultivate what brings joy, to savour her connection with cosmos. Thus she transforms her suffering through a sacred return to creative living…Little by little, World Weary Woman discovers that living vibrantly is a creative process, an intimate experience whereby she becomes fully known.”

Living vibrantly, joyfully, playfully, creatively, life as an adventure, centered around a core question of “What does creative living require of my today?” This is a philosophy I could embrace.

Shortly after reading this book, I found myself in pottery class, no longer focused on the quality of what I was creating but filled with a new sense of freedom, of play and allowing myself to bring to life that which wanted to be created and suddenly out of the clay a World Weary Woman appeared in my hands. Excitedly I rushed over to show my husband my wonderful creation, my creative genius and proudly beaming over at me he said, “Ah, it’s a hippo.” And we laughed and laughed. This World Weary Woman is learning to play!
This book brought a new level of consciousness into my life and has shown me how “living in my head, leaves the rest of me dead”; it has provided me with a compassionate understanding of my wounds and of my journey; it has brought a new found sense of belonging in the world and of self-acceptance, has opened up the possibility of creating without attachment to the outcome and the greatest gift of all a question that now guides my life: What does creative living require of my today?”

If you are world weary this is the book for you. Till next time, I wish you an adventure in creative living!

Tasha Tollman
Follow this link to purchase the book http://www.innercitybooks.net/book.php?id=96

1 comment:

Lois Carey said...

I simply must order this book! I learned through my journey the importance of PLAY and so became a Sandplay Therapist. At 88, I am still helping a few women on their inner journey through Sandplay and have written several book on the topic. The most recent is "When Pixies Come Out to Play" that is a collection of some of my trainings, etc., over the years.